It is April and it reminds me of my office period where most of us were preparing for promotion interviews along with the routine work. It was time for brushing up our theoretical knowledge so as to face the promotion interviews with confidence. Also during the same period we had to do our routine medical boards and submit reports to confirm that we are fit and fine. These annual events do bring joy to most of us except for a few. While we always wish the best to happen, at times, this period also reminds us about the fragility of our lives.
After successful completion of all the tests, I was waiting along with my friends to meet the general physician to collect the medical report. A nurse walked in and specifically called my name. I was asked to meet the specialist cardiologist and without much delay I was ushered into the consulting room. Results were not that good as explained by the doctor. I was advised a medical emergency confirmation test to be carried out the very next day. I walked out the room in dismay and despair.
Within the last five minutes, my whole world changed upside down. I am unable to explain the feelings, the emotions and thought processes that ran through my mind at that time. I could see the next day, predict the next week, next month and a few years ahead what possibly can happen in my life. All the so called worries I carried so far with me got shattered in the last five minutes and I am nailed to the wall with one single problem, the medical emergency.
As we all know, time cures any problem and there I am waiting for more detailed examination with the best doctors available in the city. I moved to the hospital along with my immediate family and stayed there overnight. All through the night, I pacified my spouse that nothing is going to happen and shall be alright soon. On the day of examination I got up early and got blessed listening to a beautiful devotional song on the PA system.
A couple of hours later, I found myself along with similar patients in a lounge outside the Cath lab and ICU. There were three independent couches on one side and three similar couches on the opposite side. Each couch had an ECG terminal and a medical stand attached to it. Six of us were sitting on these grand chairs with probes attached for monitoring vital readings. We were all alike in disposable uniforms with masks on. At first look, gender is not clear and is not very important too for we were aware that we are going to embark on a very important medical procedure that may make or mar our future.
I turned to my friend on the left. A well built strong man with folded hands. On any day, he can lift four men of my size. I initiated a talk by enquiring his whereabouts. True to my assumption, he is a mason specialised in marble flooring work. Very strong and hard working fellow doing heavy civil work. He is on his fifties and forced to visit the hospital due to a sudden development in his health. To return this talk, I mentioned about the circumstances under which I was sitting by his side on a similar situation. On my right, I could see a person happily munching sweet buns. He was enjoying the bite in all respects and I could not find any problem with him other than his hospital attire and the cable and connectivity to equipments. The person sitting just opposite to me removed the mask and I could make out that she was an old lady. Looking at me, she said that this was her second visit and signalled not to worry.
A week back, I was in the company of my school friends in a corporate club in the city. One of my school mates is visiting his home town from USA. As usual, discussions were on various matters including wealth, politics and issues in our own country. As usual we blamed the government, our seniors and many people for all the problems we are facing in this world. And now a week later, here I am with another set of friends bonded through yet another facet of life, Illness. There are no complaints but only prayers. Life shows us different frames and I was reminded that we have to pass through multiple roles with varied emotions and sentiments.
Human life is fragile: we live in the space between one breath and the next. We often try to maintain an illusion of permanence, through what we do, say... how we enjoy ourselves... Yet it is an illusion that is constantly being undermined by change and death.
Courtesy :Victoria Finlay
On this same hospital lounge, there were many other exhibits also. On one wall there was this large television with a Malayalam news channel showing news about some domestic violence. A drunk husband had hit his wife and daughter with some sharp tool and both of them are battling for their life. I thought it would have been better if they switched channel to a some cool cartoon or music. A number of nurses were walking inside the lounge where we were sitting. Patients are brought in stretches or wheel chairs. In between, the nurses run sometimes or rush in and out of adjacent rooms. I started thinking what is going on the rooms ahead of this lounge ie., the CATH lab and the ICU.
Somebody called my name and I was moved to lie on a stretcher. I vaguely remembered a local injection on my right hand by a nurse but it was hardly noticed. A set of files, a few bottles and set of packed material were kept on top of me. I was enquired about a few things, presence of any metallic ornaments including false teeth etc for which I replied in the negative. Also they doubly checked my name to match with the hospital wrist band I was wearing. The stretcher started moving away from my friends in the lounge to enter a more secluded place with large screens, light, instruments and a set of beautiful people to receive me. In a few seconds, I was on a more comfortable bed. Without asking I was covered with a few pieces of coverings of which some of them had openings. My hands and legs were comfortable positioned and suddenly wished my bed back home also had similar facilities.
Hours later, back at the same lounge, I understood my examination was over. A few patients whom I met in the morning are also back sitting along with me. I have noticed that all of us are under automated monitoring systems. Occasionally, nurses walk in and call the patients by name and move them to either Cath labs or ICUs. I was wondering about my fate and what is in store for me ? I remembered about a tour plan with family to a popular hill staion.
I was mentally prepared to face any eventuality and promised myself that better days are going to come and this is only a test by god almighty. One week of shut down in my life taught me many things. what is important and what is not so important. To live a contented life with full of gratitude. With this mind set I had seen the doctor and was quite relieved to note that what ever little problems I have is curable and that it all depends upon how I change my thinking and life style.
I again thought about my fellow friends in the hospital lounge. I thought about the strong build person, the old lady and the cool friend eating bun. whether they are okay just like me. I had my prayers for them too. A few moments can change each of our lives and this is the important lesson I learnt here…..
Ajith Kumar
Sir, fact of life depicted very well.
Most often hospital ICUs are eye openers to the fact that life is like a bubble which can break any moment and we all foolishly fight with each other in office or personal life for nothing. Like u mentioned we need to live life of gratitude, show empathy to our fellow humans and do good things.